Buenas!!
I made it alive! I am here! But this place is NUTS. So apparently, the group that I came with are all 2 weeks early. There was some miscommunication between Salt Lake and here, but I was supposed to enter the MTC 2 weeks after December 5th, but they got it all worked out. They had to do some emergency changes to compensate for us, but it all worked out! I guess I'll just start from the beginning. So we flew all day monday which was annoying because we didnt get any sleep, but we landed around 8 something and the president, his wife, and the AP's were waiting for us. Apparently there was some soccer superstar on our flight, so there were all these papparazzi people waiting when we got off, so that was interesting haha. But right away we could tell we werent in america anymore. There were people with huge guns allll over "guarding" the airport, a few dogs running around, and a ton of kids just begging for money and messing around. There were 4 in our travel group coming from the Provo MTC and then like 10 Latin elders coming from the Guatemala MTC 30 minutes after us. So we ate wendys (really random) and waited for them. Once they got there, we all loaded into a few different cars and headed for the AP's house to stay for the night. Thats where it got really interesting. There are absolutely NO laws for driving here. We were probably going close to 100 miles an hour, if not over, weaving in and out of traffic. All of us new missionaries thought we were going to die. Here, people honk ALL the time, but it doesnt mean they are mad. It just means "Hey im coming up behind you at 150 MPH, so dont make any sudden movements." So crazy haha. We got to the house where the AP's (area presidents who are like in charge kind of) and the rest of the office missionaries stay. It was like WAYYY nice, like shockingly, so that was cool. We pretty much just went straight to bed and started in the morning. It was all orientation stuff and what not, and then we went to a nearby park to do our first contact. They put all the missionaries with a missionary who has been here a while and sent us on our way. I was with Elder Partridge, one of the AP's, so that was fun. The spanish here is HORRRRIIBBBLLEEE. Like you know how rednecks from the deep south speak english, but its still hard to understand them? These people speak like redneck spanish. They drop the letter s whenever they feel like it, so words that I know dont sound anything like they should, so its way hard. But anyways, it went pretty well. Everyone is SUPER nice and always willing to listen. It was a cool experience even though I really didnt say much, but its all good haha. So we finished up with that and headed to the president's house for dinner with all the new missionaries. We were all just hanging out eating when all of the sudden the AP's were like "Elder Shuga and Elder _____(some latin elder from the Guatemala MTC that I dont remember), youre coming with us." We were like ummm ok, why just us? And they wouldnt tell us. It was really weird. Everybody stayed and hung out and we just left without them explaining why haha. They just took us with them to go do some teaching for that night, so thats cool, but I still dont know why us haha. It was a crazy. People here all have gated porches and leave their front doors open, so if you want to contact them you stand outside and go "Buenas!" which just means like "hello". They usually come out and will talk to you. We did that a few times and people said they were busy or whatever, but we got in to two houses. The first one was a lady with a little family and the second was just some guy. Both were really interesting. The first one because I actually did quite a bit of talking and did a little object lesson I learned at the MTC about prophets and she seemed to understand what we were teaching after that. So that was cool! Also, while we were teaching, she just whipped her shirt up and started breast feeding her kid without covering herself or anything. Thats normal here and I have seen it roughly 150 times in the past week. More on that later haha. The next contact we did was some guy who was sitting on his couch inside, shirtless, with some plastic bag sitting on the ground. We did the whole "Buenas!" thing and eventually got in the door. It turns out he has a catheter and its his little pee bag, so that was interesting. I didnt really understand the spanish during that lesson, and next thing I knew, we were giving the guy a blessing. I didnt say anytihg but I was just like "Oh, ok. We're doing this I guess." haha. Weird. Look how much I've written and Im still on day 2. Crazy! Anyways, changes were the next day and I got my new companion, which means I said bye to Elder Stewart :(. Sad day. But my new companion is Elder Zura from Mexico. He speaks english really well, but not perfectly, and its a HUGE blessing to me. Originally I wanted a companion who didnt know english, but now I am glad I have him haha. He's cool and has been out for a year. He is really good and everyone loves him, so thats cool. I got put in the zone Progresso Sur in the area La Sarrosa. Let me tell you a bit about this place. We are in the jungle. That's about it haha. Its just like a bunch of villages. Some people have houses (including us) but most of them are just one room "houses" made out of various materials. Metal sheeting, bricks, mud, you name it. Whatever they can find. We live in a legit house, but there is only water at night time, so we have to fill a bucket up to collect water, then shower by taking like a dog bowl and filling it with the water from the bucket and pouring it on ourselves. Its always cold. And the toilets dont flush, so you have to pour water in to them until they go down. This is my life for the next 22 months. I'm starting to miss my 1st world country haha. This place is nuts. There are wild animals EVERYWHERE. I have seen chickens, roosters, dogs, cats, horses, dogs, pigs, and I've been looking for monkeys but have yet to see one. They are all like WAY skinny, specifically the dogs. Kim would have a blast with her dog obsession, because you see a different one every five seconds. But they are all mutts. I swear all the animals here partake in crossbreedings. I saw a chicken who had like duck qualities and a duck who was colored EXACTLY like a cow. I know that sounds crazy, but trust me, things change south of the border haha. We pretty much just got right in to working and went to visit our investigators. We have 10 baptisms set up for this week. Crazy right?? We think we are going to be the Zona Celestial, which is the zone that gets the most baptisms and gets dinner at the presidents house. But anyways, we like walk through jungles to get to peoples houses. Its ridiculous. You walk through mud and trees and everything, then all the sudden their is this little shack with these people sitting outside waiting for us. One of our investigators is like diabetic or something and swollen up like a balloon. Its really sad, but shes super nice. The ward mission leader here is Hermano Gallego and he is SUPER maciso, which means he is like way cool and helpful. He gives us references like allllll the time. We went over one time and he gave us 20. We dont know how he does it haha. When we go from appointment to appointment, we stop by little stores called Pulperias and by Bulas de Agua. Bags of water. They are little like 4 by 4 inch, 1/2 liter bags of purifed water and they cost like 2 Limpiras, which is like 5 cents. You just rip a corner off with your teeth and suck out of a bag. Its way fun haha. When we have to go to a reallllyyyy far appointment, we take a Mototaxi or a bus, both which are nuts. Mototaxis are just like 3 wheeled motorcycles with a backseat. Google it. They just zip us around where we need to go. Its pretty funny. And then they have busses that just go back and forth down the only road in our area. Those are even crazier because they way they work is that you just hop on as fast as you can, because they will drive off if you move to slow, and then get off as fast as you can because they won't let you take their time. They are just school busses. And everyone stares at me when I get on because I am a gringo. They have like never seen one before, so Im fascinating haha. Its weird because the busses are really ghetto and bad, but they have these super nice flat screens and sound systems playing spanish music videos all the time. People dont understand how to spend money here. They all live in huts, but they all have tv's and cell phones. Really weird. And the busses and taxis are all covered in stickers that say religious stuff like "Jesus is my Savior" and what not, but then they have marijuana and playboy stickers. They have a ton of american logos and stuff here, but I dont think they know what they mean or what they say haha. One of our investigators was wearing a Marbalo Ciggarrete shirt and I asked Elder Zura "What?! She smokes??" and He's like "Dude, she has no idea what it says". Pretty funny. The members here are really nice. Hermana Magda is my favorite. She is this lady who is just SO happy and hilarious. Its so funny. She loves hearing me speak spanish and trying to help me. One random thing about here is that SO many people have American names, but they use a spanish accent. Wilmur (wheel-moo-r), David (dah-veed), etc. There was this little girl of a member who was practicing her english to me and it was way funny because she was horrible and im horrible at spanish. Then I asked her what her name was and she goes "Keembearly". I was like "KIMBERLY? no way! I know a kimberly..." hahaha. The LDS churches here are like the nicest buildings in the whole country. They are all gated off, the lawns are all mowed, and they look just like american churches. All the other churches here are just rooms with plastic chairs that have pastors SCREAMING their heads off about Jesus. Its quite entertaining. Our church sticks out like a sore thumb. Its the only place without trash everywhere. Thats another thing. There is trash EVERYWHEREEEEE. Elder Zura and I had just gotten some bulsas de agua, finished the, and he just threw his on the ground. I was like woah pick that up and throw it away when we find a trash can and just said "garbage trucks dont come to this town. This is the only place to put it." So I have become a forced literer. Dont think differently of me. Im still the same. Im not a scumbag, I have to do it haha. Apparently the area I am in is the hottest in the mission. Yayyyyy! They say April is DEATH, and I thought now was death, so that should be interesting. I'll tell a weird lesson story and then a cool lesson story. So we were teaching this family of a girl and her toddler and her two older brothers, when all the sudden this olddd lady comes stumbling up, drunk out of her mind, and it turned out to be the grandma of the family we were teaching. She went inside, came back out, and had xrays of her horribly broken wrist and kept trying to show it to us while we were teaching. She kept disrupting the lesson, so we asked if we could just come back another day and they agreed. So we asked to end with a prayer, said it, and when I opened my eyes, I saw that the mom had whipped her shirt up, leaned over, and let the little toddler breast feed standing up. It was so weird haha. On to the cool story. We were teaching this family that is getting baptized this week and we asked the wife to say the prayer after she had just finished. Elder Zura kept asking and asking and she was just like "noooo im too nervous" so he was about to move on and just say it himself. I stopped him and explained to her how I understood EXACTLY how she is feeling because thats how I felt when the missionaries were asking me to pray (michelle can testify to that haha). Then I told her how she didnt need to feel nervous, we werent going to judge her, and she was going to be able to feel the spirit 100 times more if she offered it. I asked her to pray one last time after that , and she did! I was like OH YEAH BABY and she offered a suuuuper good, sincere prayer. It felt awesome. Another werid thing is the handshakes. The people give dead fish handshakes everytime. When I first got here, I went for the firm "make a good impression" shake and the guy just like rested his hand in mind. It felt so uncomfortable haha. And women dont shave their legs. Its weird. Yesterday (Sunday) was quite an interesting church experience. They like dont know how church is supposed to be. You know how family wards are always loud with kids and what not, but the parents to their best to stifle them? The parents dont care here. The kids were running everywhere (even up on the stand where the bishopric was) and they just let them do it. They have these really nice vases of flowers on either side of the stand, and they are like SUPER taped down with duct tape because they dont have AC in the chapel, just 8 super high speed fans, so they always wobble like they are about to fall haha. Me and Elder Zura teach gospel principles every sunday, but all I did was bear my testimony and testify a little bit about the structure of our church and how it fits with the bible. But it was good from what I've been told haha. The ward is getting ready for a huge trip they are taking to the temple in Tegucigalpa. They are stoked out of their minds. These people dont have water, but they saved up 56,000 Limps (280 bucks which is a TON for them) to get 7 busses to take them there. Its really cool. Well, I think thats it. This letter is super sporadic, but thats just how I feel like its been here, so forgive me haha. Just be glad I'm talking about more than just 4 square now haha. Oh, and if anyone wants to send packages, do it just through USPS. No fedex, ups, dhls or anything like that. Im not sure why, but thats what they told us.
Vaya bien!
Elder Shuga
I miss Shuggah
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